Trauma leaves marks that we can’t always see — on our minds, our hearts, and the way we navigate the world. But healing is possible, and God meets us right in the middle of the battle.

One of the most difficult battles in life is the battle you fight within yourself. The struggle to overcome adversity, temptation, loss, feeling unloved, rejected, guilt, or fear. The test we face can either become our downfall or our testimony. We can choose to become a victim or become victorious.

It’s painful to feel rejected and unloved by those who are supposed to support you. Efforts to reconcile are met with distance, and I’ve witnessed these same patterns with other family members. I never thought I’d be in this position, but here I am—after years of enduring abuse and neglect—having spoken my truth about how our family’s actions have affected us. Our visits are overshadowed by indifference, and our children are left hurt. After everything, I’d hope this would be easier, but it isn’t.

PTSD is a silent killer. I have mastered the art of faking it, putting a smile on my face, and pretending everything is just fine. Shoving everything since I could remember into a deep, dark hole and hiding it, fearful of showing any emotion because that makes me weak. Right? At least that’s what I was told growing up. Emotions are bad. I am bad. I will never amount to anything. Pick yourself up by your own bootstraps. Get hurt and cry, suck it up, I’m not raising a baby, I will give you something to cry about. This is what causes hardened hearts. This causes a person to become a people pleaser, pushing those closest to them away out of fear and a desire to avoid failure. This is what causes sleepless nights and fear of losing everyone you love and care about, because those closest to you don’t even love you or want anything to do with you.

I debated whether to write this, knowing I’ve made my own mistakes and acted out of pain. Adult responsibilities came early for me, sometimes enforced harshly. Mixed messages left me feeling alone and punished. The shame and guilt linger, resurfacing unexpectedly. I can’t share this with you because you’ve convinced yourself it was my choice, though it was not. Anger and self-punishment became patterns. Now, I’m choosing to stop hiding—acknowledging my trauma instead of pretending. Stress and anxiety from the past can be overwhelming. Self-doubt and harsh self-judgment are daily struggles. Yet, I turn to God for strength, laying my burdens before Him. I’ll serve Him all my days, prioritize my family, and forgive those who persecute me.

The Bible says that Jesus calls sinners to join him, sometimes the worst of the worst. Look at Paul, before Jesus called him, he persecuted Christians and killed them. But Paul became one of the most well-known apostles of Jesus, even dying a horrific death because of his love for Him. He sits, eats, and comes to save sinners, not the righteous. Their stories made the most positive impact. Why? Because their story didn’t end with their mistakes, it finished with their comeback. The enemy wants me to think “I’m defeated,” but my story isn’t finished. My victory is coming! If this touches and changes one life, it will all be worth it. To stand in the presence of God himself and hear these words, well done, my good and faithful servant.

The enemy wants us to think we are weak, that we don’t know where to look for the answers, or that our mistakes are too much for God to restore. However, we have comfort knowing that God truly does restore us, removes our sins, and makes us whole through His one and only son, Jesus.

" If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

1 Corinthians 13:3-7 (NKJV)

So no matter what is said or done from this day forward, if we don’t have love or practice these things listed above, we gain nothing. Boy, that’s hard. I have personally shattered the record of keeping wrongs, and I have had some serious hatred in my heart. I haven’t always protected, trusted, or persevered either.

I don’t know when I will be called home. Time comes and goes quickly; on every gravestone, there is a beginning and an ending with a dash in between. What I do during that dash is what truly matters. I can choose to let my past continue to haunt me and ruin my present, or I can choose to let go and let GOD! I can choose to forgive as many times as it takes and pray as long as I have breath in my lungs.

So,

Let Them.

Let them judge.

Let them misunderstand.

Let them leave.

Let them talk.

Let them doubt.

Because I am not here to carry the weight of their opinions.

I am here to protect my peace, walk in purpose, and trust the One who never leaves my side.

Let this be a reminder.

To release.

To rest.

To let go.

And let God.

I am not for everyone — and that’s not a flaw, it’s freedom.

Let Them — And Let God

" Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."

Luke 23:34 (NKJV)

In context, Jesus spoke these words on the cross just before he gave up his life. All of our sins were laid upon HIM on the cross. The pain and agony he must have felt broke my heart. After being persecuted, spit on, beaten, abused, cursed, and accused. HE said Forgive them, they don’t know what they are doing. That’s my FATHER! He is blameless and without sin, who took on my sins and the sins of every single person because He loves me. He has forgiven every wrong and every sin I have committed. With tears in my eyes, I need to repeat that. HE has already forgiven me.

Jesus didn’t just endure—He released.

He let them speak, accuse, and walk away. He didn’t chase, correct, or beg to be understood. He let them… and trusted the Father.

When I let go of what I can’t control, peace replaces anxiety, and freedom replaces resentment.

I begin to guard my heart, not harden it. To love, not cling. To forgive, not explain.

Today, I take a deep breath. Ask, “Jesus, help me let go—and trust HIM to handle the rest.”

Prayer: Lord, help me release what isn’t mine to carry.

Teach me to walk in grace, even when I feel misunderstood.

Let my peace come from You, not their approval.

In Jesus’ Name Amen